There will come a day when everything I do isn’t related to my kids. A time will come when they won’t take all of my attention, brain power, energy, and life. There are moments when I cannot wait for Aaron to be content somewhere other than my arms. There are times when I feel like Michael is causing grey hairs (I have yet to see evidence, but they have GOT to be coming because of that child).
In all of this — during the midnight feedings (and the hour by hour snuggles/crying), the craziness of the day to day life, the diligent childrearing I am trying to do — there will be an end. There will come a time when they don’t need me 24/7. When Mommy hugs don’t cut it anymore. When they move on to bigger things and start their own lives.
Before Aaron was born, I was always urging Michael to go above and beyond, encouraging the “smarts” in his brain. He is smarter than I give him credit for, and yet I had encouraged it. But now that Aaron is here I feel the intense need to slow down.
It’s exhausting. Aaron is more fussy than Michael was, and adding to that a 3yr old who is pushing every little (and big!) button he can think of, it wears me down before I can make it downstairs in the morning. But my boys won’t stay this way forever, and I don’t want to miss it.
Slow down, Life. You’re moving too fast.